My name is ghosdog and I am a 49 year old Male. 

I was diagnosed with BPD in early 2003. A year before that I was a happily
married father, with two daughters in college, and a successful 47 year old
information technology senior sales professional. In January I ‘crashed’
due to the stress of a sadistic boss, far beyond anything ever seen in
twenty years; leading to very severe depression and anxiety, and as turned
out, BPD. Over the next 18 months I was hospitalized 4 times; went through
partial and day programs (lots of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)); went
to Dialectal Behavior Therapy (a form of CBT targeted for BPD) five days a
week for over a year; and am now in group therapy. I have been unable to
work since crashing and at this point have almost no sense of drive,
motivation or direction for work, or 'play' for that matter; however,
depression, anxiety and BPD symptoms are reduced significantly. The work IS
paying off. Slowly maybe, but it truly is.

I continue to have SIB urges and powerful desires to escape under some
stresses. DBT has been very helpful in teaching me many useful coping and
other skills. Also helpful, is a wife who has gone from the shock, fear and
anger that my early acting out created for my family, to being very
supportive and understanding, and knowing how to balance giving me needed
space and time with ‘reasonable’ expectations.

Your request for help is not an imposition of any kind; you will be at least
as helpful to me, in helping me reach out and do more, as I am to you.

My email is: ghosdog@comcast.net